Thursday, February 9, 2012

What is Love Anyway? {Day 2 of Love Series}



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There are three types of love:

Agape

Philos

Eros

Over the next few days, I am going to try to unpack these three different types of love and how they relate to our relationships.


I'll begin with Agape!

Agape love is an unconditional love!  This is the love that the Heavenly Father lavishes upon us ~ being the very nature of who He is!  {1John 4:8} It is sacrificial love ~ clearly shown in Christ's death on the cross for an undeserving world. {Romans 5:8}

Agape love is choosing to love with no expectation of receiving anything in return!


This, my sweet friends, is the type of love that God calls us to extol upon our mates!



One practical way to do this is to rid yourself of what I like to call "Stinkin' Thinkin'"! {I know I didn't come up with that term originally, but I currently can't recall where I first heard it.}

"Take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ!" {2 Corinthians 10:5}

Years ago, my husband and I were part of a small group of fellow church attenders.  We met every week, and went over a Bible study that we were all doing. Occasionally, the men of the group would get together and have some fellowship time without the wives.  One particular night, they met at a local restaurant.  My husband had agreed to be home at a reasonable time since we had not had any personal time together due to his heavy work and school load.  As the night continued, he was not home. Hour after hour passed, and I began feeling more and more discouraged in his lack of consideration for me!  Let's be honest...I was pretty angry!  As bedtime approached, I was having very harsh thoughts around not speaking to him, or giving him "what for".  My own personal Stinkin' Thinkin' kicked in, and I was having thoughts like: "He doesn't love me!" "He has never cared about me more than himself." "He never puts me first." "He never follows through on his commitments to me." "We are hopeless." But, the Holy Spirit spoke to my spirit and reminded me of the verse, "Do not sin in your anger." {Eph. 4:26}

"Wait! What?"

"Do not sin in your anger!"

Umm...you can imagine I was blindsided...yep, blindsided by the Word of God!  In that moment I started changing my thinking..."I am disappointed, but he probably has a good reason." "I will give him grace and listen." "I will not sin in my anger!"

What came of that situation?  Well, he came home full of apologies.  I didn't let him off the hook though. {I'm not saying this was right or wrong.}  What I did do, was tell him how disappointed I was.  I told him how his actions made me feel unimportant to him.  I said these things with grace, a gentle spirit, and love.  Not because I wasn't angry, but because I was choosing to love him whether he deserved it or not!  I could only take responsibility for my part!

Don't let your own Stinkin' Thinkin' come between you and a beautiful relationship with your loved ones!  Take those thoughts captive.  Give the other person the benefit of the doubt!  Choose to love them, whether they deserve it or not!  Love sacrificially! Show them Agape love!

Usually the effect is you become irresistible. They become "won over by your gentle and quiet Spirit." {1Peter 3:4}

Come back tomorrow as I unpack Philos kind of love...

{Oh, and finally give away those diapers!}



Thanks for stopping by! Be Refreshed!











1 comment:

  1. I remember that situation and was so proud of you for being able to beat the evil one once again. You are an awesome wife, and have taught this to me also. Sure makes a big difference in your own life, with any of your loved ones.

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